What happens when (just two months after meeting) a Baptist preacher's son and small-town pastor's daughter surprisingly discover they've committed the ultimate faux pas? Now it's a journey of finding out what it is to love a little baby surprise and what to do about this new husband.



Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Losing It

I fear that pregnancy has caused me to lose all sense of decency and lady-likeness.  I've always been a bit of a tomboy, but mom always taught me to have lady-like manners - especially around men.  Lately, however, I'm losing it.  I burp, fart, snore and all other manners of bad womanly behavior. 

It's particularly abhorrent to me, especially as a new bride.  If I'd managed to do this whole love and marriage and babies thing in the correct order, you betcha I'd be sure to wear my best new-wife shoes.  As life has it, this is not the case and I find myself, sometimes accidentally and sometimes not, doing and acting in ways that leave me aghast.  I can only imagine how my new husband feels. 

I've managed, within a week of being married, to fart on him, go to the bathroom (#2) while he was right there beside me, and burp louder than I've ever heard him burp.  I think it should probably correctly be classified as a belch.  Now that I think about it, I'm not sure I've even ever heard him burp.  Oh God!  This is worse than I thought.

This past weekend, I managed to embarrass myself (which was also cause for great laughter) as I had to pee horribly while out on the boat.  Since the water was cold, and his boat just happens to have no ladder, Yohan ended up holding me over the side of the boat as I tried to also grab on and pee without touching the water.  This was taken to difficulty level #5 since I believe I'm bigger than he is these days.  Refer to picture:


I do wish I was able to properly do all the things that a good wife would do - cook properly balanced meals for dinner, clean the house, prune the bushes and flowers and dote on my husband.  But for now we're making it work with a more modified version, a newer more modern version, a version that is also working on making a baby unexpectedly.  So until this little Jr. graces us with his presence our home life will consist of Yohan cleaning the bathrooms while I make delicious chocolaty cupcakes to satisfy my craving.  The laundry will remain all over the house and I'll do what I can when I can to little by little get it all done.  Too bad Jr. won't be coming out fully functional - then I'd never have to clean the bathrooms again.  I can honestly say now to all the moms' whose hair has been disheveled, make-up not quite done or who sport a messy house - I FEEL YA!
Love, Edamummy

3 comments:

  1. lol! This post is cracking me up babe! It's all good baby, you got the prego card:P I'm gonna feed Jr Miraclegrow once a week in hopes of having him do chores to help mommy out sooner than later:)

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  2. I've told many people, especially these days, that my "look" is that of a stay at home mom. It's bad... Yoga pants, sweat pants, and all. After Cavory I was in my "skinny jeans" in just two weeks, but after Linkon I'm still sporting spandex!! LOL

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  3. Ahh hahaha - this is great :)

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